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Engines

by Manatree

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1.
Brushfire 02:10
You wanna run full time I can’t get enough Living through black and white Leaving in a rush Is that all that I wanna know? Forcing love like a ghost? You don’t feel sane with that brushfire creeping up Kill that noise in our ears, we’ll parade when it’s gone You’re gonna leave me tired Quiet and caught up Stuck in all the same lines We’ve been pushing off Is that all that you wanna know? Forcing love, then you go? It’s not the same as it was, got those curtains drawn After all that noise stops I just wanna be alone
2.
On and On 03:00
Hold yourself, it’s not too late For us to rise from our mistakes Putting all our fresh clothes on And leaving when the lights come on Oh my god, we can’t relate We think too much, we hesitate Bracing for some bloodless dawn And leaving when the lights come on All our lonely, tiny, tampered fates What have I misplaced too long? The time that stretches on and on Keep the quiet from the noise I can’t relate the other boys Oh my god Oh my god Settle on What I’m from All our lonely, tiny, tampered fates
3.
Fragments 02:44
Heads in the dust All that I want While the trees Are pulled to dark Keeping secure Through all we endure With all this time Pushed over us I don’t get a chance to think what I want You don’t get the words you want before Time wraps us up and drops us off I don’t get the words before you’re Gone, each day Starts apart either way A fragment of What now is gone The air in my lungs And the wet on my tongue While the trees Are pulled to dark I don’t get a chance to think what I want You don’t get the words you want before Time wraps us up and drops us off I don’t get the words before you’re gone
4.
The Words 05:03
I can see the way you wander When I’m in the house it’s hard for me to bother You keep up the fight We’re stuck in while it ages It keeps you in your mind No one likes the way you fake it I keep above the ground Because I like the way it changes But I can’t figure out How to make it stay the same way Cause when we have our moods They come and go like seasons Keep us in these rooms There’s no space here to begin with You don’t have to work You don’t have to fight now Those are just the words You hear when you’ve had enough You take what you want until it’s gone Even if it doesn’t mean too much You can take the thoughts you want along You take what you want until it’s gone, and it’s on us You spend a long time waiting on so many words You got a lot of hesitation coming from what You think is the unseen reason why it all hurts I don’t pretend to know, I don’t pretend to know You don’t have to work You don’t have to fight now Those are just the words You hear when you’ve had enough You take what you want until it’s gone Even if it doesn’t mean too much You can take the thoughts you want along You take what you want until it’s gone, and it’s on us You take what you want until it’s gone x3 Even if it doesn’t mean too much x2
5.
Too close to the fire, I won’t let my vision drown In this old house with my inhibitions down I’ll keep alive, feeling like a tiny child Marrying the old chores, dire and forbidden Always at odds with that indecision I will keep alive, even if I don’t know why Timeless Spineless Back home Homeless You can track a line through time I’ve forgotten Messily arranged with all of my mine lit up It’s not the first time I’ve been surprised, oh no I can hear a voice, you’ve been awfully quiet We walk through every day, lay mile over mile But I will keep alive, even if I don’t know why Timeless Spineless Back home Homeless I know Always I know Boneless You don’t speak For anything that isn’t what you need I fill the silence with my own drifting It’s just a part of us now And I don’t need To feel a truth that brings me to my knees I set it far apart from everything It’s not a part of us now
6.
Engines 03:37
I was a criminal that day Asleep and on my way A single blessing on it’s own Can make me feel at home Always waiting for the nights To leave the silence out of sight I saw a vision for myself And a hope for me now And a hope for me now And back there somehow You always told me I would be lonely If you could help me I’d live such a wild life I’d wait and I’d wonder My head always blundered And every fucking engine binding us would pull me under I’m a servant with no rights Never had a vision for the work I spread alight Another victim to our time Kept apart at distance whenever we would fight And it’s you always told me I was younger than a boy And it’s you who’s always known Tiny boxes engines glory Some old ghost who knew my story Told me I was lifeless boring Some machine made from gore and a mourning It’s what we called our love Was tearing me apart It focused on my heart And told me how to start I tell myself when I’m scared That it’s easy not to care It’s not easy not care But that’s an older story We’ve moved on Our other loves pull us more strongly No one’s coming for us, we got Caught in something trivial, our luck
7.
Dark Room 04:06
My warm face in the dark Present to all, master of none All of time floats, it’s nothing to know It’s nothing to hold It’s all in the rush Quieter than voices get The humming of our moving parts Tired like all the rest From moving back through who we are But my wet palms, nervous of loss Born through the fear I come across Like I’m in debt and I don’t know it Like there’s a real face to put on You don’t need a sign to love It’s nothing they can keep from us You don’t need a hand to hold To find out what you already know
8.
9.
Backwards 04:37
All of time in, time in A feeling in the back of your head Just the same as it always was You lose your mind, that fiction’s The only thing you have when you’re sad Just the same equilibrium All the time you look back A feeling that I wanted to say Just the same as the future You lose your mind, that friction’s The only thing you have in the day Just the same equilibrium Don’t feed the ghost The one you hate the most Everything is all under control Everything’s the same backwards Don’t feed the ghost The one you hate the most Everything is not under control Everything’s the same backwards
10.
Staying Up 02:02
Staying up all too late Living through our mistakes All my hopeful loved ones Vacant til the morning Quiet thoughts left voiceless Covered up by noises Silent and sedated Til I have to wake up We move on through continuum I don’t need this mess I don’t get upset Out in Montreal Long before the dawn There’s nothing to know It’s all in the rush Ever tired, running all these lines Through a web of lights rushing past both sides I can see you there, whenever we land We have all we need if we forget we’re tired
11.
You see when you get uptight With all our clean lives too far from the fire It’s so timeless feeling alone With all my modern lies and this ageless tired And our daydreams suddenly die When they reach the light of motion And there’s all this force that holds you by the throat And you’re frozen, weightless And when the running water of each day defines Deep ridges in our vision And the dust gathers over sunshine And enforces our inhibitions And you can’t move your thoughts through Your own elation But this moldy air will give way Sometime, I can taste it Keeping up a voice for too long Suffocating through the unknown You get up first and feel your first words Never know when you could let go There’s nothing I need where I’m off Celebrate the feelings I know You’re walking between bare trees in the fall You’re everywhere at once and nowhere at all
12.
You cover up the morning, physical That keeps our violent, ancient sense of place Even if I tried I can’t think anymore Through all the noise that traps me in this space You wake me up through silence, physical You’re tired lines, you’ve got a nose for this I don’t know why, but I feel stronger love Through all our quiet, I know I can’t replace And you’ve got to keep moving, push your breath along You know that it’s much harder if you ever stop You cover up the morning, when I’m gone I feel the ebb and flow of that release I don’t know why, but I feel stronger love For you than all that I could not replace And you’ve got to keep moving, push your breath along You know that it’s much harder if you ever stop

credits

released July 12, 2018

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Manatree Richmond, Virginia

music for both ears

Jack Mayock
Alex Elder
Jim Burns

Richmond

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